Wat, Post the Second

Woman approaches counter and, based on our interaction, appears to be suffering from some kind of aphasia.

"Do you have any cards that--"
She makes a robot /chopping movement with her hands--
"They tell you what to do...
It's a health...
Like for your muscles and bones?"

I'm not aware that we've ever carried any kind of dominatrix stationary that can karate-chop your bones into health, but clearly, the error was ours. Please tell me where I can find such a thing and I will stock them immediately.